I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize