we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
