Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
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