Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
