If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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