i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize