:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Randomize
