First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize
