If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize