Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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