Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Randomize
