Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
