Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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