I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
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