No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize