You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
