Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize