it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
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