When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
