1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
