I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
