Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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