It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize