everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize