i was born a porn star she said
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Randomize
