I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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