I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
