i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
