im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
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