My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
