i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
