New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Randomize
