Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
