ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
