the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
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