So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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