What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Randomize
