I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
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