oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Randomize