i just wanna soil my oats bro
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
