If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
