wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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