I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize