so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Sorry my hands just texted you
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
