I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
