I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
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