I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
he was CRYING into my vagina
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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