at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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