please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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