If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize